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Planning Your Wedding Vows

  |   By Angie Kovacs

Walking down the aisle and pledging yourself to your partner will no doubt be the highlight of your wedding day. Exchanging vows will be one of the most emotional and important elements of the ceremony and you will have to decide what to say and how to say it. Do you go hyper-personal and write your own vows or stick to a more traditional templated script?

There is no right or wrong answer here; there are many types of wedding vows and no type is more valid or meaningful than another. The first step in preparing your vows is by deciding what type of vows you’d like to exchange at the ceremony. Speak to your partner about what they’re thinking would work best on the big day and consider your relationship. You can also speak to your officiant and receive examples of scripted vows from them which you can use as is or personalize to suit your style.

A more traditional vow template may have you and your partner responding to standard questions as you promise to wed, similar to this:

[Name], do you take [name] to be your lawful wedded wife/husband? Do you promise to love and cherish [her], in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her/him, for so long as you both shall live?

If you do choose to write your own vows in their entirety, those words should reflect what you feel you need to say to your partner on the big day. Some couples opt to keep it short and sweet, others make them a little more silly and unconventional or deeply romantic. 

You can always present your vows as a list of things which you promise to do in your marriage. You can also write a larger speech in your own words. This can be anything from the romantic aspects of your relationship, to vowing to take turns washing the dishes. If you are planning to write these types of vows you have no limit on what you can say. Start off with a foundation of what you’d like to convey in to your partner and you can work it out from there.

Other sweet options you can add to your vows:

  • Talk about when you realized your partner was the one
  • Tell a story of a significant moment between the two of you
  • Share an inside joke 
  • Use a line from a favourite movie or song that you love

Although your vows are public, in essence they are for you and your partner, so don’t censor anything you’d like to say. These special words are something you and your partner will cherish after your wedding day, and whether that means following the traditional wedding vow model or writing your own it will be highly personal and incredibly special. 

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