Planning a wedding is a big job, so there’s no reason why you should go it alone. Involving your future hubby in planning is a great way to spend time together and ultimately have the wedding you both want. If you’re unsure how to get your man involved or interested in wedding planning, we’ve compiled a few helpful tips:
1. Plan together
Sonia Gonzalez, professional wedding coordinator and owner of One of a Kind Weddings and Events in Toronto, says she is seeing a lot more grooms involved in the entire planning process. “In the past, grooms were lead to believe that wedding planning was left to the bride," says Gonzalez. "However, the modern bride now works a full-time job just as the groom does. Ultimately the wedding is not just a celebration for the bride, but for both the bride and groom.” She suggests making the planning a team effort by bringing him along to appointments and making major decisions together.
2. Play to his interests
The best way to get him involved is to play to his interests, whether he’s creative, handy or technical. Split tasks based on things you are both interested in or have a specific set of skills in. Assign him tasks he’ll enjoy, like picking the music, creating signature cocktails, building a photo booth or ordering transportation. You could even have him plan the honeymoon and surprise you with the details. Having him write his own vows is also an essential, and always romantic, task.
3. Get creative
Go through inspiration and ideas together and ask for his thoughts. “Sit down and discuss the theme and vision for your wedding and create a sort of game plan and inspiration board," says Gonzalez. "This way it is clear before you start planning what is needed, wanted and budgeted for your wedding vision.” Be supportive and keep an open mind to his ideas. Even if his ideas aren't what you envisioned, try not to constantly shoot them down, as he may get discouraged.
4. Set aside "wedding time"
Designate a day or night for "wedding time" instead of bombarding him all at once or at random times. Or get the wedding party together for a monthly wedding session and make a fun night of it (it will also give him a chance to get together with the boys). "In my experience grooms that have been a large part of the planning process were extremely proud of the outcome of their wedding," she says. "Dividing up vendor responsibilities, delegating tasks and simply keeping an open line of communication together will really entice him to be involved in his wedding day."
5. Allocate responsibilities
Just because you want him to enjoy planning doesn’t mean you should be stuck with all the essential, sometimes difficult tasks. He is your partner after all, so ask for his help and support. He might want to help, but just doesn’t know where to start or what to do, so create a designated task list and schedule. “Grooms must step up to the plate and participate if they ultimately want a wedding day to reflect their style," explains Gonzalez. "I am finding that for this reason grooms are much more involved because they also want a wedding day to remember.”
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